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SEL
Grade 3-7
Empathy, Kindness & Healthy Friendships Cheat Sheet
A printable reference covering empathy, kindness, active listening, I-statements, boundaries, conflict repair, and healthy friendship signs for grades 3-7.
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This cheat sheet helps students understand empathy, kindness, and healthy friendships in everyday school and social situations. Students need these skills to work in groups, solve conflicts, include others, and make safe choices with friends. It gives simple steps and sentence frames that are easy to remember when emotions feel big.
Key Facts
- Empathy formula: Notice the feeling + Imagine their point of view + Respond with care.
- Kindness rule: Choose words and actions that help, include, or encourage others without expecting a reward.
- Active listening formula: Eyes toward the speaker + Quiet body + Listen to understand + Ask one respectful question.
- I-statement formula: I feel ____ when ____ because ____; I need or would like ____.
- Healthy friendship rule: A good friend is respectful, honest, supportive, fair, and safe to be around.
- Conflict repair steps are Pause, Name the problem, Listen to each side, Choose a fair solution, and Follow through.
- Boundary sentence frame: I am not comfortable with ____; please ____.
- Apology formula: I am sorry for ____; it was wrong because ____; next time I will ____.
Vocabulary
- Empathy
- Empathy is understanding or trying to understand how another person feels and why they may feel that way.
- Kindness
- Kindness is using helpful words, choices, and actions that show care for yourself and others.
- Active listening
- Active listening means paying attention to a speaker and showing that you are trying to understand.
- Boundary
- A boundary is a clear limit that helps protect a person's body, feelings, time, or belongings.
- I-statement
- An I-statement is a respectful sentence that explains your feeling, the situation, and what you need.
- Healthy friendship
- A healthy friendship is a relationship where people feel respected, included, supported, and safe.
Common Mistakes to Avoid
- Saying "I know exactly how you feel" can be wrong because each person has their own experience. A better response is "That sounds hard" or "I am here to listen."
- Giving advice too quickly can be unhelpful because the other person may need to feel heard first. Listen, name the feeling, and ask if they want help.
- Using blaming language like "You always" or "You never" can make conflict worse because it attacks the person instead of the problem. Use an I-statement to explain your feeling and need.
- Ignoring a boundary is wrong because everyone has the right to feel safe and respected. If someone says stop, change your action right away.
- Staying in an unfair friendship because it feels familiar can be harmful because healthy friendships should not make you feel scared, controlled, or constantly left out.
Practice Questions
- 1 A classmate drops 3 books and 2 folders in the hallway. Write one kind action and one kind sentence you could use to help.
- 2 During a group project with 4 students, 1 student has not spoken yet. Write one active listening question that could include that person.
- 3 Turn this blame statement into an I-statement: "You never let me play at recess."
- 4 Your friend shares a secret and says they feel embarrassed. Explain how empathy, listening, and kindness can guide your response without trying to fix the problem right away.